Hot Coals

I spent this past weekend at the Tony Robbins’ Unleash The Power Within event just outside Chicago. The four day event focused on transforming oneself into a more fully realized person. I know that most people have a negative association with Tony, built up after years of seeing him on late-night informercials. I’ll admit I had a similar bias prior to seeing him at another event earlier this year and recognizing a real level of sincerity in his presentation on stage. I decided back then I would check out this popular four day event to see what the buzz was about.

I did enjoy the experience. I did learn a lot. I know you’ll all see the difference in the coming years.

At the same time, I didn’t have as powerful of an experience as some of the other people there. I still found the weekend to be worthwhile, but I knew that some things weren’t clicking as much for me initially as others (I finally was able to get some stuff to click better).

One reason: I didn’t fear the hot coals.

A popular and shocking component of the event is that all participants firewalk on the first day. Day one is designed to prepare you to walk on a bed of hot coals ranging in temperature from 1200-2000 degrees. It isn’t a fake moment. There are flames. They even tossed down a fresh bed of coals right before I walked.

For some reason, I didn’t fear it.

I blame it on Mythbusters. There was an episode a season or two ago all based on firewalking, and I saw Adam do it several times without injury. For me, this diminished the risk or the fear.

Don’t get me wrong, I still have many fears: heights, snakes, sharks. Many have heard my bungee jumping story. It remains a major moment in my life. I’m not over my fear of heights, but I have reframed it. My fears now are related more to outside sources. I feel like I can control heights and heat, but snakes and sharks are separate entities with their own agendas–that scares me.

So the firewalk hit and I had no problem with it. I honestly didn’t feel fear during the day. It was weird.

Others crossed it and felt a huge sense of accomplishment. I crossed and felt like I had a cool story for dinner conversation.

But as I went through the weekend, I realize there are still other aspects of my life that scare me. There are things that still cause me fear. I know I get nervous in pursuing the big speaking engagement (not the speech, but the booking process). I know I let fear contribute to writer’s block. I know get nervous about dating. I know I get fearful about athletic opportunities. Most of these fears involve someone else.

So hot coals? No problem.

Opportunities to excel with others? Potential fear.

I’ve told my bungee jumping story a hundreds of times now. It’s a simple realization that there was great joy in jumping, and the fear was in the waiting. This obviously translated into my approach to the firewalk–I really do believe I could have done it hours before we actually did (although I will fully agree that there were hundreds of other people at the event who needed more time to prepare). I don’t have as much fear for these external physical challenges now, but I’ve taken far too much time stalling in the room with the personal ones.

If you’re honest with yourself I think you can admit to the same truth.

The world will be perfectly fine if no one bungee jumps, sky dives, firewalks, or swims with sharks. We do not need to do these things to live.

However, if we fail to pursue our passions, if we fail to take on new opportunities, if we shrink our spirits and fail to grow our hearts, our lives will feel poor, and we will never be able to truly serve the people around us at our full capacity.

Today, think of something that scares you (not firewalks or bungee jumps), but some opportunity that causes some slight anxiety. Take a pledge. You have six months to take it on. You can do it. It’ll be scary, but sometimes it’s all about that first step.

I’ll be doing the same : )